Happy International Talk Like a Pirate Day!

Ahoy, mateys!

In honor of today, September 19th, being International Talk Like a Pirate Day, I've decided to take a break from the usual talk of toxic chemicals, environmental destruction, and the irreversible damage we've caused to the planet to offer some dumb hilarious environmental-themed pirate jokes!

Q: Whats a pirate's favorite owl?
A: A baaaarrrn owl

Q: Where does a pirate buy his/her groceries?
A: At the faaarrrmer's market (If pirates can buy local food, you can too)

Q: How do pirates fight global warming?
A: By reducing their caaaarbon footprint!

Q: Whats a pirate's favorite toxin?
A: Aaaaarsenic!

Q: What kind of milk do pirates drink?
A: aaaRBGH-Free (pirates say no to bovine growth hormone. obvs)

Leave your dumb hilarious eco-themed pirate joke below.

How do pirates fight global warming?

By reducing their cAAARGHbon footprints!

(Actually, there is a point to the this blog post, the pirate joke was just a freebie.)

Apparently, increased numbers of pirate attacks on ships carrying large loads of chemicals have raised international concerns about chemical terrorism. According to Chemical and Engineering News, last year there were 263 reports of attempted or actual attacks on vessels worldwide. Of these reports, 23 were on chemical tankers and 29 were on product tankers, which may carry bulk chemical loads that include oil. These numbers are exepected to be grossly under-reported.

Um. If terrorism is the only concern with ships carrying 40,000 tons of cancer causing toxins across the ocean, then I'll be dAARGHned.